Monday, February 25, 2013

Verde-In Defense of Country Music


Verde-In Defense of Country Music

Country music is the best god damn music on the face of the planet. I’m not a music snob by any means, and will listen to anything (except new rap: outside of like 3 songs its godawful). However as far as bang for your buck, country is the best, because it goes with every situation: driving, day drinking, night drinking, tailgating, fucking, etc. Okay maybe old school R&B is the best for fucking but anything to distract her from my tiny penis, large gut, and overall terrible sexual prowess will do.

I once was like the rest of you, young, naïve, and ignorant to this essential fact of life. Then one day freshman year, a senior friend of mine, a mentor if you will told me something I’ll never forget. “90% of country songs are about the 3 best things in the world: Drinking, Hot Chicks, and America” – I don’t know about you but I think those are 3 pretty good things. So I gave country a shot, and here I am, 4 years later, as big a fan as they come. I’m aware this is an unpopular opinion in the New York/New Jersey area, but fuck you, it’s a stupid opinion, broaden your horizons people. If you got a problem come say it to my face this summer at Toby Keith at PNC. I’ll be the one in an ignorant tank top, camo shorts, double fisting tallboys, probably hooking up with an ugly girl or two.
Drinking- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XtMy5IBmX7E

Hot Chicks- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7HX4SfnVlP4

America- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DWrMeBR8W-c


P.S. If you think having a mentor is gay kid’s a Navy SEAL now, learning Tagalouge, the native language of the Pillipines, Dude’s gonna be killing pirates in like 2 months. Excuse me for looking up to him

 

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